i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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