mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"