new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.