I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
