Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(205): View more from Alabama

HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.

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(586): View more from Michigan

i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.

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17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Read it at the TFLN blog
(303): View more from Colorado

It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...

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(336): View more from North Carolina

he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes

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(425): View more from Washington

We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.

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(716): View more from New York

He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila

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