I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
