somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
