I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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