i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
