It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
There are leaves in my underwear?
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
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