Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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