She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
