I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
