bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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