i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize