I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
