Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
There are leaves in my underwear?
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