I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
