he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
