he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize