True but thats because hes a fetus.
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
