Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
