**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
too bad you live with your parents still
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
