just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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