Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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