At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
We smell like vodka and hangover
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