Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Randomize
