just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Houston, we have a squirter
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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