my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize