is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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