Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize