i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
