You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
