i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
