If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Randomize