Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
How naked do you want me to be?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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