wat bout pragnant strippers??
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I have aggressive nipples.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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