just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize