No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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