She announced her abortion via fbk
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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