If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize