That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
