so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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