I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
