i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
No I am not eating basil off your cock
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
