dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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