He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
