haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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