Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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