he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
