There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Actions speak louder than pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize